When we compare, it can go one way or another. It is only good when doing so in light of Christ. For example, we perceive who we are as sinners in God’s eyes and that we need Christ to save us. On the other hand, comparing is bad when we choose to be ungrateful and let our pride take over. Paul explains this in 2 Corinthians, 

“For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise. But we will not boast of things without our measure, but according to the measure of the rule which God hath distributed to us, a measure to reach even unto you.” – 2 Corinthians 10:12-13 (KJV)

We see an example of this in the parable of the prodigal son in Luke 15:11-32. The father in the parable divided his sons’ share of land equally between the two of them. But not long after that, the younger son left with all he had and squandered his possessions in a distant land. After losing all his money, he returned to his father.

When the father saw the younger son from a ways off, he prepared a feast and gave him his best robe and shoes. The older son saw what his father did, and he was upset.

“And [the older son] answering said to his father, ‘Lo, these many years do I serve thee, neither transgressed I at any time thy commandment: and yet thou never gavest me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends: But as soon as this thy son was come, which hath devoured thy living with harlots, thou hast killed for him the fatted calf.’”

Stuck in the Comparison Trap of Ungratefulness

The older son was comparing his younger brother with himself in a wrong way. He was ungrateful to his father because of the happy reunion given to his younger brother. Through his many years of working for his father, he never received a feast, yet his younger brother got a fattened calf. That made him ungrateful to his father.

When we view that another person’s life is ‘better’ than ours, or that what they have is better than what we have, we often desire to have what they have or want to be on the path they’re on. 

This type of comparison shows we’re discontented and ungrateful.

Stuck in the Comparison Trap of Pride

From the parable, we can see that the older brother looked down on the younger brother, and thought himself better. He had never left his father, he didn’t squander his money, and he had worked faithfully for years.

When we perceive that what we have and/or what we’ve accomplished is “better” than what others have, we will elevate ourselves, thinking I’m “better” than them. Our pride is thus shown.

All of us have fallen into these traps one way or another. In both, we focused on ourselves and what others are doing. These become our idols as we put them above God in our lives.

Escape the Comparison Trap by Giving Thanks 

Rather than looking at the gifts, shift our eyes to the Giver. So that we may be thankful and content while praising God for His graciousness and the blessings He has given us.

Paul writes that we should give thanks in everything, “for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” (1 Thess. 5:18 KJV, emphasis added)

Based on the verse, if we do not give thanks in everything, we are not following God’s will. As hurtful as this may sound, it is the truth. 

To truly give thanks to Christ means we –

1. Trust God wholly,
2. Believe that God is who He says is,
3. And are submitted to His will.

Whereas complaining shows that we –

1. Doubt God,
2. Don’t believe that God is who He says He is,
3. Are not submitted to His will.

We are undeserving of the Lord’s goodness and mercies, yet oftentimes we are discontented and we complain. Remember the amazing love that He has showed by paying for our sins through Jesus Christ.

When we see the Lord blessing a person next to us, praise Him for blessing that person as well! For He is faithful, gracious, and merciful to us and them.

Escape the Comparison Trap by Humbling Ourselves

Instead of honoring ourselves, we should humble ourselves before the Lord. Acknowledge that all of our accomplishments and what we have are because of Him, and not of us. He is the one who blessed us, and He is the one who brought us to where we are. Not us.

“For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” – Romans 12:3 (KJV)

Conclusion

When we compare ourselves to others, we may choose to be ungrateful to God for where we are or what we have. Whether we recognize it or not, we may also fill ourselves with pride. 

Instead, we should take a step back, and look at what God has done in our lives and who He is. We ought to be filled with humility and thanksgiving when we recognize what Christ has done for us, who we are under His eyes, and what we truly deserve.