“Look, I picked up more leaves than you!” boasted Jessica, my five-year-old cousin. “Thanks!” I answered, quickly sweeping up the scattered remains of what had been a nice, tidy pile of leaves. “You did a great job!” I added, trying not to show my annoyance.
This morning, as I was sweeping the yard, Jessica had come running over to me with a broom and dustpan, announcing that she was going to help. Before I could respond, she began to enthusiastically scatter the leaves that I had just swept into a pile. It was all I could do to stay calm, make her feel useful and at the same time finish sweeping the yard.
As I thought about it, however, it dawned on me that often this is how it is when we think we’re serving God. We want to serve Him and “do God’s work”, but the truth is that God can do whatever He wants without our help. Not only does He not need our help, but our attempt to help often gets in the way.
When a young child wants to help us do something we often allow them to, knowing that they will probably get in the way more than help, simply because we value their desire to be helpful and want them to feel useful. There are times, however, when a young child can be very helpful, but only when they are following instructions. The more a child learns to follow instructions without asking “why?” and arguing, the more that child can be helpful. Only when we look to God for guidance and follow Him regardless of our opinions and feelings, can we be useful and enhance His work.
This is a lesson that I’ve been learning over the past few years. I used to think that I could serve God, that I was going to “live my life for Him” – and as disciples of Christ, that is what we are called to do. We should strive to live in a way that is pleasing to Him, making it our goal to become increasingly Christ-like in our words, deeds, and lives. But I had the misconception that I was somehow capable of doing something for the Lord – and I tried my utmost to do so. Yet no matter how hard I tried, things simply didn’t work out, and I continued to face problems and failure. Finally, I came to the point where I had lost all confidence in myself and didn’t think I could ever be of any use to God – or anyone. I questioned my worth and couldn’t understand why anyone would love and accept me for who I was. I didn’t think that I would ever make it, and was never sure if God was pleased with me.
Suddenly it dawned on me that all along I had been depending on myself, and trusting in my own strength, instead of depending on my Creator—the Source of all strength and wisdom—which was the cause of all my problems. My eyes had been on myself instead of on Jesus, and that had thrown me into a downward spiral of despair and frustration.
Then, when I realized for the first time in my life that God loves me despite who I am, that He has already done everything necessary for me to be saved, and that all I need to do is simply believe, trust, and rest in Him, I felt an indescribable joy and peace in my heart. Gradually, I began to understand that although on my own I can do nothing, through Christ I can do all things; on my own, I am a failure, but through Christ, I am more than a conqueror; on my own, I am imperfect, but through Christ, I am perfect. Though I may feel unworthy and incompetent, God says that His grace is sufficient for me and that His power is made perfect through my weakness. He promises that “[He] shall also confirm you unto the end, that ye may be blameless in the day of our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 Corinthians 1:8 KJV), and that “Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.” (1 Thessalonians 5:24).
“Like as a father pitieth his children, so the LORD pitieth them that fear him. For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust.” – Psalm 103:13-14
Yes, God knows that we are weak, sinful and full of failure, that “we are dust”, yet He loves us anyway and promises to carry us through till the end.
Not only does God love us, but He has also chosen us and given us a chance to have a part in His work.
“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.” – Ephesians 2:10
God made us the way we are for a reason, special and unique, and He has a plan for each of our lives. Our worth, value, identity, and abilities are found in Him alone, and we can take comfort in the fact that whatever He gives us to do, He will always provide the strength we need to do it. All we need to do is trust and rely on Him as we follow His leading. We can be confident that God is faithful to keep His promises, that He will never leave or forsake us, and that His presence, protection and guidance do not change based on our feelings or circumstances.
“Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 8:37-39
The incident with my cousin reminded me that I can’t do anything to “help” God, but if I want to have a part in His work and be a blessing to others, I must first learn to give up all of my own ideas, stop depending on myself, and be willing to trust and follow Him no matter what.
Even when we fail, when we think we can no longer persevere, we know that we can do all things through Him who strengthens us. No matter what point in life we’re at, no matter how we feel, God is always right there, protecting and guiding us. Although we still live in these sinful, earthly bodies, we are conquerors because Jesus won the victory on the cross. With our eyes fixed on Him, we won’t get proud because of success or discouraged because of failure, knowing that everything we have done right was done through Him, and every sin and failure has already been forgiven because of Him. Satan wants us to forget God’s promises and depend on ourselves so that he can get the upper hand, but through Jesus, we will certainly prevail.
“For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.” – Philippians 2:13
“Rejoice not against me, O mine enemy: when I fall, I shall arise; when I sit in darkness, the LORD shall be a light unto me.” – Micah 7:8
